


Just share this space with me

by Flightless_Bird



Series: "My Alexander" [1]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Alex is a good friend, Coming Out, Fluffy, Other, Platonic Cuddling, aromantic/asexual Madison, cute nicknames, its cute ok, mentions of touch-sensitive character (Thomas), platonic crushes, talking things out
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-09
Updated: 2017-04-09
Packaged: 2018-10-16 19:33:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10578057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Flightless_Bird/pseuds/Flightless_Bird
Summary: "He lifted his head and nearly had a stroke when he saw those brown eyes wayyyy too close to his. They were half-lidded, and fixed on his mouth, and Alex was leaning in, and holy shit, okay, that was—"





	

**Author's Note:**

> For Anna; I wrote this obnoxiously fast for you, because I know you love these two and you've been such a good friend to me. I hope you like it :)

James wasn't entirely sure what was going on in the kitchen right now, but he was sure that it wasn't going well. Which sucked, because he'd been looking forward to some food right about now.

  
Normally, when Thomas Jefferson, Royal Pain in the Ass, invited someone to his apartment, they said no. And ran in the other direction. But James was a different story. He was the only person that could stand Thomas, mainly because they'd grown up together. So when Thomas invited him over, of course he'd said yes.

  
He'd just happened to be with Lafayette, Laurens, and Hamilton at the time. So he'd accidentally said, "yes, _we'll_ come over." They were all stuck with him here now.

  
Laurens had grumbled about it, Laf was all right, and Alex had gone through just about every curse word known to man. If it weren't for the fact that all of them were there with him, he probably wouldn't have shown up.

  
Long story short, there James was, sitting on the couch in the living room with ID Network on the TV and an argument brewing in Jefferson's kitchen.

  
Just another normal day.

  
"If you insist on making mac and cheese again, I will let Alex come back in here and kick your ass." That was Lafayette, and James was a bit surprised at the amount of irritation in his voice. Laf didn't tend to get riled up, but when it came to food, he was willing to put up a fight.

  
"It's my house, my rules," Thomas shot back snidely. "Besides, Hamilton can barely reach the top shelf. I doubt he can kick my ass if he tried."

  
"Maybe he can't but I sure as hell can."

  
"Laf, it's just food, for god's sake. You don't even have to eat it."

  
"If I came all the way over here, I'm gonna eat someth—"

  
"Uh, guys?" That was Laurens, speaking up for the first time with a note of exasperation in his voice. "I don't really think it matters that much and I really would rather not fight right now, so can we not?"

  
There were two beats of silence. Then Laf muttered something in French, and that set Thomas off, and before they knew it, an all-out brawl in French was spewing from the kitchen. Safe on the couch, James sighed and turned up the volume of the TV a bit. He wasn't about to attempt to understand any of what those two were yelling in there, that would mean getting involved. If there was one thing he'd learned from being friends with these guys, it was that one did not try to enter an argument once Jefferson started in French. Nothing was going to shut him up now.

  
A set of footsteps padded against the floor as someone passed through the kitchen. James heard the familiar voice of Alexander Hamilton raise over the incessant French yelling: "sorry I'm late! Hey Jefferson, we better not be having fucking mac and cheese again!"

  
"No one asked for your opinion, jackass!" Jefferson shot back, switching to English again, eloquent as always.

  
There was a pause and then he growled irritably, telling James that Alex had probably flipped him off. He lifted a hand to his mouth, hiding a smile. He'd always had a soft spot for Alexander. He'd known Thomas since they were teenagers and the only time he'd seen him get truly ruffled was when he met Alex. It was hilarious, and immensely entertaining for James. Ever since then, he'd been secretly happy to find that Alex would be hanging out with them or when he ran into him at a few classes.

  
"There he is, the only sane one in the place." James glanced up as Alex rounded the end of the couch, looking charmingly lazy in grey sweatpants and brown eyes glimmering playfully. He took the place next to James, close enough for their shoulders to brush a little and turned that crooked smile on him. "Hey, Maddie," he greeted, with the casualness of old friends.

  
He was the only person to start calling him that and the only person who was now allowed to. "So I'm the only sane one, huh?" he asked in lieu of a greeting. "You do realize that means you just admitted that you're insane too."

  
"Of course," Alex answered grandly. "Everyone's a little insane, after all. Well, except you." He cast James a sideways glance, narrowing his eyes in mock suspicion. "I'm not sure how you turned out so normal..."

  
Rolling his eyes, James shoved him in the arm. "Shut up," he scoffed. "I'm hardly 'normal.'"

  
"Oh yeah, true. I forgot about that time you got drunk and tried to sing 'I Will Always Love You.' To a chocolate bar I bought you."

  
"....it was really good chocolate."

  
"You _sang_ like a _high school girl_ , Madison."

  
"I think I'm starting to get why Tom hates you."

  
At that, Alex wrinkled his nose. "Ew, don't give him nicknames."

  
"Why not?" James asked with a laugh.

  
"Nicknames mean you like him and who could like _that_?" Alex jerked a thumb over his shoulder, where a cacophony of French swearing was rising in the kitchen. It was only broken now by Laurens' voice attempting to keep the peace and failing miserably.

  
James grinned teasingly. "Hey, you gave me a nickname," he pointed out. "Guess that means you like me, even though you're infuriating."

  
"Guess it does," Alex agreed, a fond curve to his lips and something soft in his eyes. They held eye contact for a beat too long. James had to break it, gaze shooting down to his hands in his lap. Alex was a great friend, he really was, but... That kind of looking was a bit...much.

  
They fell into a companionable silence, then, just the TV (and more of Jefferson's and Laf's shouting) buzzing in the background. Alex draped an arm on the back of the couch behind them, a content laziness in the way his head tilted while he watched TV. It made his hair shift around his neck, just barely grazing his shoulders in loose, dark waves. It drew James's attention to him, to the way that Alex's position invited him to maybe rest his head on his shoulder. His fingers trembled a little nervously. He liked that kind of physical contact, but he wasn't sure if...well, it could be interpreted as....but Alex was his best friend.

  
_Alex was his best friend_.

  
Holding his breath, he slowly leaned his weight over until his side met Alex's. There was a slight tensing of muscles under him. Then it faded and Alex even shifted his arm to make it easier for James to move closer.

Encouraged, he let himself relax against Alex, touching from shoulders to hips now. He couldn't remember the last time he'd touched someone like this. Thomas didn't like it, anything in the form of cuddling sort of bothered him; he'd been in a relationship that had ended badly, so badly that he was now touch-sensitive in a way that made it hard for him to show affection. James had been sure he wouldn't be close enough to someone to try something like this again.

  
_But I like it_ , he thought, a rush of fondness making him bite his lip over a smile. And he did like it. Alex was warm and soft in a well-worn T-shirt, and he smelled nice. He wasn't doing anything, he was just letting James sit there with him, arm loose around him. The thoughts of unwanted pressure and questions was starting to fade. James had never been so comfortable with someone before.

  
But then.

  
"Hey, James?"

  
"Hm?" James hummed, expecting some offhand comment about Thomas and how much he sucked again. What he got, however, was Alex's hold becoming firmer around his shoulders. He lifted his head and nearly had a stroke when he saw those brown eyes wayyyy too close to his. They were half-lidded, and fixed on his mouth, and Alex was leaning in, and holy shit, okay, that was—

  
Alex's fingers touched his cheek and James flinched. "D—don't."

  
Immediately, Alex stopped, blinking in puzzlement. "What?" Then his eyes went wide and he snatched his arms away from James. "Shit, I'm sorry," he stammered. "I thought... You were just so...up against me, I assumed... I won't touch you again."

  
"No, it's not that," James hurried to amend. Confusion was written across Alex's expression and he wanted to kick himself for getting them into this. "I—I really like you, Alex, and you're my best friend. I just can't like you...like...that."

  
Alex's brow furrowed. "What do you mean?"

  
Oh hell, it was not supposed to happen like this. Sighing, James rubbed a hand over his temple. Oh well. He had to find out sometime. "I'm, uh, I'm aromantic," he mumbled. "And asexual."

  
There were a few moments of quiet. James curled his fingers atop the couch cushions nervously. He wasn't sure how Alex reacted to this sort of thing, if he would even understand or if he would laugh it off as nothing. James's heart clenched. If Alex laughed at him, he wasn't sure what he'd do.

  
"So, wait, let me make sure I understand," Alex began, and James nodded uneasily. Alex pointed at him and then at himself as he spoke. "You don't _like_ like me. You don't wanna do that with anyone. You don't like kissing or anything beyond that, ever. You only see me as a friend."

  
"No, um," James struggled to explain. "I see you as my best friend and maybe something closer? But not in a romantic way. I don't really know how to explain it."

  
"Okay..." Alex thought for a moment. "I got everything else right, though?"

  
James nodded again, discomfort making his skin prickle. He hadn't talked about this so closely, not since he'd told Thomas so long ago. He didn't even want to imagine what was going through Alex's mind right now. What if he really liked James and now he'd found out this? What if this ruined their friendship? James's stomach churned at the thought.

  
"Is cuddling okay?"

  
James blinked, finding Alex's eyes on him questioningly. "What?"

  
Alex motioned at the two of them. "Cuddling, the way we were sitting before," he explained. Evidently, talking about cuddling with James made him blush because his ears were tinged pink now. "Are you okay with that?"

  
"I—Yeah," James admitted, fighting down a delighted smile. "I actually really like that, with someone I'm close to, as long as it's..."

  
Alex raised his hands in an I get it gesture. "Platonic," he finished. A smirk curved his mouth then, a hint of play edging into his voice. "Best Friends Cuddling. BFF Cuddling."

  
"You're just picking on me now," James chuckled, shaking his head.

  
Gasping theatrically, Alex splayed his hand on his chest. "I would never!" Then he waved a hand as though to brush off James's words. "Besides, all of those were too specific anyway. It's more like 'Alex Cuddling.'"

  
"You think you're the only one I'm gonna do that with?"

  
"Well, I _am_ the one you have a platonic crush on, apparently."

  
Laughing, James pushed him in the arm. "Arrogant jerk."

  
"Aw, you know you like me." Alex batted his eyelashes stupidly and that had James snickering all over again. Grinning, Alex leaned back against the couch and slung his arm over the back again. He arched a brow at James as though to say, _what're you waiting for_?

  
Gratitude for him swelled in James's chest. Ducking his head shyly, he slid over into the open space of Alex's arm and pressed his side to Alex's. Alex rested his arm lightly across James's shoulders. "This okay?" he asked, tapping James's shoulder.

  
"Yeah," James answered quietly. He lifted his gaze to Alex's face for a moment. "Thanks."

  
"No problem."

  
They sat like that, TV screen casting a glow over the room and their friends' conversation humming behind them. James found himself relaxing again, as easy as breathing, into the curve of Alex's side. Before he knew it, he'd rested his head on Alex's shoulder, eyelids drooping lazily. Every once in a while, Alex's fingers would trace little circles against his shoulder; everything he did was careful at first, waiting for James's response and James smiled to himself. He was lucky, he was really lucky to have a friend like Alex.

  
"Maddie?" Alex asked softly.  
"What?"

  
"Thanks for telling me." Suddenly awkward, he cleared his throat. "You, uh, mean a lot to me. I don't mean that in a—"

  
"I know," James interrupted. He closed his eyes, feeling safer than he had in a long time. "You mean a lot to me too."


End file.
